Blameless
By the part who's fed up
Sexual Assault is the most prevalent yet the most underreported crime in the world. April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, and as a multiple-time survivor of sexual assault and an advocate for other survivors, I want to share statistics and a poem to illustrate how something so serious, painful, and life-threatening is often misunderstood and minimized.
• 1 in 5 women and 1 in 71 men in the U.S. have experienced rape or attempted rape in their lifetime.
• 1 in 3 women and 1 in 6 men experience some form of contact sexual violence.
• Every 68 seconds, someone from the United States is sexually assaulted.
• The majority of survivors know their perpetrator. Most are men, and 1 in 4 identified alleged perpetrators were acquitted or never charged.
These numbers represent real stories of real people. As survivors, we often don’t report sexual violence because we are not believed and silenced through stigma, coercion, and control.
Here’s a poem from my heart to challenge hurtful and harmful narratives around sexual assault:
a brief lapse in judgment
a misunderstanding
there’s not enough evidence
of what you are claiming
*
with me he’s respectful
a true gentleman
he’s not inappropriate
wouldn’t hurt anyone
**
he’s gentle and nice
been helpful and kind
he denies it all
must have been the wine
***
it’d be such a shame
to hinder his potential
what happened is unfortunate
but quite inconsequential
****
there’s a chance he’s innocent
and if it happened just that once
since it’s very unlike him
she might have led him on
*****
i mean, look at his legacy
it speaks for itself
he was probably confused
needs our prayers and help
******
and by the way she’s responding
and the way that she dressed
we can tell she’s to blame
*******
and why come forward now
seems convenient, calculated
seeking money or attention
he must be vindicated
********
and she should learn to let go
and stop acting a victim
cancel culture is toxic
God says she should forgive him
We need Awareness, Action, and Access to support, services, and safety. We need systems that provide protection and resources in crisis. And here’s another A: Accountability.
Survivors: You are not alone. You are whole. You deserve to be seen, safe, and supported. I believe you!
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Thank you. I am so fed up.
A much needed post on information needed by all.